SADLY MISSED AT 1:00 A.M.... my last prayer!

 Innalillahi wainna ilaihi rojiuun And ALFATIHAH

As the phone conversation went on, I listened intently and understood what had transpired between my cousin and her sil.  I did not interrupt.  But understood that she had to go alone and probably had to sleep there, in the Pantai Medical Center which is not far from my house.  Before she left, we had a mug of hot coffee each.  We have not seen each other since Aishah, her youngest daughter came home for a short holiday from Nottingham last August.

Today, all my children with the exception of Hafiz, went to break their fast elsewhere and obviously I had to do it alone.  Surprisingly  at around 6:40ish p.m the bell from gate rapidly sending signals.  Was I expecting any visitors?  Nope, no one had called, thought I.  But then through the vertical blinds I managed to see the vary familiar figure.  Standing there, trying to phone (again??).  Suddenly I remembered where I had placed my own.  Surely I would see many missed calls from her.  I signaled  through the window, that the gate was not lock.  She had successfully unlatched it and maneuvered her black Perdana... down the slope she drove and parked just the exact place she always used to.

First the normal "introduction" of not seeing each other for some time.  Then relating to me all her recent  TV appearances which I have missed.... they were about the upcoming "Women's Day Celebration" which would probably be taking place in University Kebangsaan Malaysia in Bangi.  The 25th... is the day!  But I would be baby sitting Harith, my little pic.  So, I probably just be sitting in  front of the TV watching the whole occasion.  It should be grand, I hope!

After breaking of fast... (she was a real God sent, otherwise, I would be breaking it all alone)... we went up to my bedroom to have our Maghrib and Isya' prayers.  We had planned to go to the Medical Center after that.  But there was some urgent note from her sil, telling of the "not so good condition" of Our Ayah Cik Lah. I    eavesdropped and overheard her saying, she should be leaving after a cup of coffee.  So, I rushed downstairs to get it prepared.

After a couple of "teh-tarik cooling-style"... (pouring the coffee from one mug to another to make it cooler and drinkable while spilling some for the ants to taste later), she told me of the condition of her brother.  That was supposed to be the second chemo treatment which he was quite reluctant to receive.  Apparently he was in the MC since last Wednesday.  I gave two Yaasin booklets for her to bring over there and told her not to stop reading like how we had done a few years back in UH for her late mom.

I remained calm and gave her a sad good bye as she left... I felt chocked as I said to her my last few words... "Please convey my salam (regards) to Ayah Cik Lah"... and away she drove in the darkness of the night.  

I took the Yaasin green booklet myself and began  reading slowly, patiently, calmly and as though he was in front of me.  The sudden tinge of sadness crept inside me together with this strange feeling... THAT he was listening, accepting, acknowledging my last prayer for him... I was in tears without knowing its vary reason.  But I felt as though I was appreciated... strange.  I was in my house and he was a few kilometers away... YET, this is how I had felt.... a very beautiful and mysterious work of Allah.  He sent messages to us both.  Alhamdulillah syukur... and my Salam to him was also delivered on time when she arrived at the Medical Center.

This is indeed a history repeating itself.  A few years ago, I was by the bedside of his late mother, doing the same... from 10:00 p.m till I fell asleep just a few minutes before her demise at 4:00 a.m.  So I did not get to witness her passing.  When I opened my eyes, her breathing has already stopped, her chest appeared calm and motionless.

This time, I stayed up just to pass my time, waiting for her phone call and went through my FB reading messages.  At one point, my heart ticked and I thought , should I call her?  But wait.  She is probably reading Yaasin for him.  I was sure she would call me if there was anything to inform.  I was right!!!   Just as I was writing some comments, at 1:23 a.m came a call, a sad voice ... telling me... of his demised at 1:00 a.m... just 23 minutes ago.  I was chocked and in tears.  Allah loves him more.  AND apparently He had answered my sincere prayers too... TO GIVE HIM AN EASY WAY OUT.... in  whatever form and whichever way that was best for him.  Amen, Amen, Amen.

Only Allah  knows what's best for His subjects. 

This is not the first time this year I encountered passing of dear persons around me... In the middle of 1994, our dear late Dr.Rofithah Hashim succumbed to her cancer.  There was a week in July, when I lost two cancer sufferers within a few days of each other.   When would our turn be??? No one knows.  It's only Allah The Almighty knows and He keeps this to Himself.  

Our duties are "Be prepared" to go back to Him with sufficient knowledge, sufficient n quality amal to guard ourselves when we enter ""alam barzakh" and to face "the Day of Resurrection."  May all be made easier for us all. Amen.

May we be reminded by all these before we LEAVE.